goodbye

Josh

31 Oct 2001 - 19 Aug 2008

go west

meooowwww...

myo's away on reservist at the northwest side of singapore. fortunately i am bonding very well with his niece here in the east and is not too affected by his absence. which seems to bother an already agitated myo.

i don't know whether it's because of that that he's not planning to take me to his temporary shift to the northeast side of the island immediately after his camouflage stint. his excuse is that i will get irritable if i'm forced to adjust at the interim place. he has promised that i will eventually join him at his own new pad in north in january. (you following?)

which is silly of myo actually. one, i value my independence too much to care about missing him. two, myo's almost building home west side these days that it seems rather lavish to be paying rent instead at the temporary northeast apartment. (confused yet?)

myo's decision, though extravagant, is rationalized by a recent quibble with the sib. which explains why he can't just wait for his flat to be ready. having been the first single person to move out of the family house in central singapore when he was 25 while the rest moved out because of marriage, myo's not one to be comfortable living with others' follies.

but maybe myo's learnt something from the movie as to not give up his own apartment too soon despite playing house. oh well, i still hope i see him for the weekends. cos, if i don't, i'll just end up in a hole.... meoooowwwww......

cheap

meeooowww

if u're wondering why i'm still up that's because i'm forced, i repeat, forced to entertain myo while he's keeping awake. just so he can sleep on the coach to kl early tomorrow morning. myo's strange that way.

while his friends like weetz or godma kah mun travel further on the globe for work on a flight no less, myo has to be contented with a 4-5 hours coach ride to the neighboring country. to learn something from the team so as he can come back home and report on how to do things even cheaper for a project due later part of the year. yes, cheapER.


luckily, myo's not on a complaining mode these days. after all, he's been assured good company during the evenings, so i hear...

prurrrrrr.....

being real

mmeeeeeooowwWww.....

conditional love

prurrrrrrrrr.....

myo's home and apparently will be domestic for the next 2 weeks unless he decided to go somewhere nearby. i overheard that he will be doing some freelance uncommitted independent work while he's clearing his last year's leave.

he's been rather engaged despite the rare lull period in the office. yesterday he was at the other end of the island looking for some organic produce from the farms. this must be the company he's keeping these days. but apart from the smitten distraction, myo's also busy playing mother theresa to these two vagabonds:


and to think i was initially flattered with the attention before finding out they were both males. they were just loitering outside the house hoping to get some love food from myo. but because i have been a little jealous protective, myo can only afford to be big-hearted outside the gate. there are some things you just don't share...

meoowwwww....

crazy world we live in

3 abused cats dead at Pasir Ris St 21


no penalty is enough. no blame is enough. no remorse is enough. to bring them back.


no excuse, no explanation, no justification can ever absolve what you did.


i hope they find you. fast. and i hope you will get what you deserve. you f@#$ing crazy motherf@#$er.

devil won't recognize you

meooowwwww.....

i am bored. i have nothing to write about lately because i have not seen anything amiss with myo i can talk about. he seems... happy? do take note the question mark here is obviously my wry outlook of the change.

"only sad people blog" that's what i came across from some random posting.

i have not seen him sad; i have not seen him stressed; and most appalling, i have not seen him angry (which is a big deal when it comes to myo). he even talks funny nowadays. and yes that's me being cynical again...

meowwww...

not as we

Reborn and shivering
Spat out on new terrain
Unsure, unkind, insane
This faint and shaken hour

Day one, day one
Start over again
Step one, step one
I'm barely making sense
For now I'm faking it
'Til I'm psuedo-making it
From scratch, begin again
But this time I as "I"
And not as "we"

Gun-shy and shivering
Tear it without a hand
Feign brave but still intent
Little and hardly here

Day one, day one
Start over again
I'm barely making sense
For now I'm faking it
'Til I'm psuedo-making it
From scratch, begin again
But this time I as "I"
And not as "we"

Eyes wet,
Toward wide open freight
If God is taking bias,
I pray he wants to lose

Day one, day one
Start over again
Step one, step one
I'm barely making sense
For now I'm faking it
'Til I'm psuedo-making it
From scratch, begin again
But this time I as "I"
And not as "we"

- alanis

lost and found

meooowwwww....

myo just arrived home about half an hour ago and had a sheepish smile as he entered his room. and then i knew he was feeling guilty.

apparently, myo was on a shopping frenzy on his off day today buying more pants and more jeans (although he justifies that he can't fit into his pants anymore) and more t shirts and more polos. major retail therapy session going on if you ask me.

i knew later after trying to pacify me with a new bag of crystal litter (only!) that he spent the day catching up with his former desk mate who just returned from israel, syria, turkey and the middle east countries. she, yes i repeat SHE went away for 7 months all by herself trying to find herself. a chinese girl journeying through the middle east countries, clearly an anomaly amidst the burqas.

i remember how myo got a little pensive then when she left. wondering whether he would ever do such a thing. or could even afford to do such a thing. financially, physically and emotionally.

he has mentioned to me once about how he already felt lost at home. how can he be found then in alien surroundings he asked. where is his haven? and what is he hoping to find? is it a bearing to further map his life's course? or a foothold to anchor?


while myo tries to locate his answers, i shall now dig the new mountain of crystal litter to cover up my crap....

prurrrrrrrr....

selamat = safe?

meeoowwwww.....



Deputy Prime Minister Wong Kan Seng on Wednesday said information, from both local and foreign partners, showed that the wanted man is still in Singapore.
(the rest here)

the searches will be carried out in a more targeted and focused ways, based on specific intelligence and leads obtained by the police.
(the rest of the article)

so which one is more embarassing: to admit he has fled outside of singapore or that they haven't found him?

meooowwwww....

who you calling small?

meooowwwww.....

a while back myo posted old pictures on his blog. today i heard from his niece they spent the evening watching tapes of past family gatherings.

i can't decide though whether it's just simple nostalgia or he's just longing for something missing. but i'm feeling a little insecure when myo starts comparing me to his two former playmates:


pungot ('archaic' malay for stray): myo's first cat. apparently this is a deceiving snaphot. she was a tyrant from the stories i heard. they missed the sequence when she bit that hand right after. yes, she was one feisty bitch who was loved nevertheless and stayed with the family for 10 years.


girl (yes, how creative...): this is the love of myo's life that i will not even try to make any links. stayed with the family for 12 years and went through hell. and i really mean that. abused by the neighborhood kids while out roaming the corridors and thrown 5 floors down. and survived. fell off the ledge 9 floors down to the concrete pavement and lived for another 4 years before finally surrendering to breast cancer (yes, we get it too).

oh well, i'm sure we each have our own special attributes and i like to believe i'm distinguished for being myo's first male cat and my toe nibbling is an art form myo can't go without. like that movie which myo caught earlier part of the day says: "a person's a person, no matter how small". cat, people... all the same... meeeooowwwww....

only hear the good stuff?

meooowwww....

i haven't seen much of myo the past weeks. he's been keeping himself busy with work and gym so he's only home when i'm already in dreamland. i don't even bother waiting up for him anymore. and he's out of the house before i can even do my toes nibbling routine in the morning.

but since today or rather yesterday was public holiday we did a bit of catching up and watched together on the computer. i learnt then that myo had a bout of loose bowels the past week so that explained why he looked a little wearied. and i've noticed that ever since going splitsville, myo's been down a little too successive. either he would be hit by the flu bug or an onset of a migraine. even his childhood asthma made a visitation after years of laying dormant. very strange indeed.

but he was cute doing the baby talk with me just now. pity he couldn't understand a word i was saying and chose to only listen to what he wanted to hear. i basically told him to listen to what his heart was saying, otherwise he would end up getting sick every so often. but myo construed that as me telling him to move on. what a cocky b@#$%&d this myo....

now speaking of interpretation, try to figure out what my friends are saying here



what they're actually saying is:



meooowwwww.....

horrified

meeoowww...

myo had a really busy weekend. he didn't even get home until this morning and from what i gathered from him today, he spent saturday morning rowing and took his first arabic class in the afternoon. and i also found a movie ticket stub in his bag for
and i heard him telling his niece that he preferred the earlier try for instead. i heard him saying that he was more stirred by the sound effect than the subject matter. myo's a fan of horror films, especially b grade ones just for hoot, but he's unforgiving with this one.

but across the causeway the voters seemed a little unbending themselves with the ruling party losing the majority and prominent leaders losing their seats too.

"MALAYSIANS awoke on Sunday to a vastly altered political landscape after voters suddenly and unexpectedly questioned five decades of political status quo and decided it was time for a change."
(full story)

meoooowwww....

idolator

meooowww....

myo has not been following the new bunch of idol contestants. so he's really missing out on some interesting talents. especially that girl danny noriega. they should have just given her a record deal just for the attitude. here she is pre-idol



but my favourite is really this boy, David Archuleta, also seen here pre-idol:



now i wonder whether our local TV is going to bring back this competition here.

meooowwww...

repression

meooowwww...

myo just got back from supper and looking a little chipper. spent the day at the gym and did some shopping for that new pair of pants and more pull&bear tees apparently. he even managed to catch

and complained to me later that the book was more tongue in cheek than the movie. the film version seems darker and shifts the focus onto the iranian girl struggle with the cultural repression instead. somehow the dark humour of the comic book as displayed from the girl's disobedience to the constraints is not translated onto the screen.

and speaking of constraints, myo finally received the telco reminder for all singaporeans to be at one in looking out for the missing fugitive.

if you ask me, i don't think singaporeans are living in fear of an imminent danger. come on, how dangerous can a limping man be. besides there's no "information that he has any plans that threaten public security." singaporeans are more concerned how a crippled man breaks away and continues to be elusive.

"For a country that takes great pride in its non-compromising laws on detention, crime, punishment and terrorism, the escape of a terrorist, and the most wanted man at that, is a blot on Singapore's security machinery." (article here)

meooowwwww.....

de-classification

well you're the closest thing, i have, to bring up in a conversation
about love that didn't last, but i could never call you mine,
cause i could never call myself yours, and if we were really meant to be,
well then we've just defied destiny, it's not that our love died it just never really bloomed

for the longest time, myo's taste in music has always been partial to soul, r&b and even a little rap and hop hop. infectious beats with mindless lyrics. or rather, he's not one to pay much attention to the lines but more on the hooks of the melodies. fleeting and ends up skipped on his ipod eventually. they only serve to be functional during gym and the late evening jog around the estate.

but of late i've noticed music of a different genre in the likes ofand most recently



coming out of his earphone, when i greet him at the door back from the outside world. i thought it would just be something transient identifying music with weetzdom or even the random postings from perez. but something tells me it's more than just mere response.

actually, these days, myo's doing a lot of other things that defy previous classification. like taking up driving. finally.

pprrurrrrrr...

no more skinny jeans

meooowwww....

this is rare indeed. myo home on a saturday morning. caught him complaining to his friends on msn that he needs to go shopping for new pants.

myo has a strange fetish for pants and his closet actually hangs more bottoms than tops but i know this time it's not all indulgence.
is this good?

selamat = safe?

prrurrrrrr....

With Mas Selamat Kastari - terror detainee-turned-fugitive - still at large, Mr Chan did not want to take any chances. "I may have not sent my daughter to school if I had known earlier," ....
(article)

THE Government is considering relaxing the use of the Speakers' Corner at Hong Lim Park to allow for more political activities, including demonstrations...
(article)

'The Finance Minister has been judicious in balancing competing priorities and seeking to invest in the medium- and long-term future, while dealing with the immediate concerns of citizens.'
(article)

there is something almost iambic about the genesis of paranoia and the valor of deceit over a limping jail-breaker as seen in the past week's news highlights.

meeooowwww....

preoccupied with occupation

prurrrrr....

despite being really busy with work, myo's been quite attentive to the films on screens. more so than ever. i found single ticket stubs to

for the past 2 months. and he is pretty diligent with the workouts and the cardio. it's almost as if he's in a trance. a preoccupation to occupy his time and space.

meooowww....

an opening?

INTERNET users will be able to watch news, lifestyle features and chat shows live online on Singapore's first Web TV service - The Straits Times RazorTV - by July.

i don't know whether myo should get excited about this... prurrr....

you can read the rest here

gone soft?

meeeOOWWWWW....

myo just came home looking pissed. from what i gathered myo was left waiting for 2 hours before his friend finally responded by saying he was in some deep shit.

and all myo could offer was "good luck to ya" and left the place immediately after. he has definitely gone soft. few years back, i can imagine myo going into some hysterical fit, and can almost launch another gulf war crisis. but honestly, what else can myo offer? if one has decided to partake in some clutter, that is outright messy, how can you expect your friend to be sympathetic? some adults just love the drama.

meeooowwww....

new old me...

meooowww....

i have decided to leave the other blog cos it seems friendlier to post my photos here direct from the computer, instead of linking thru photobucket... yes, one, cos... prrrurrrr... i love to look at myself and two, i'm a lazy cat to go doing the extra clicking... mmmeeeoooww....

anyway, it's been awhile ay? the new year came and now we're already moving to the 3rd month of the year. myo's birthday also came and went and from the pics i saw on his facebook (that's myo's main distraction, not mine) it looked like he had a good time with people that matter most.

as for me, i'm pretty much contented with how my life is. i have no complains cos i'm grateful of what i have: myo to feed me; and comfy undies for me to sleep on. but it seems the people around myo love to offload their baggage. which i don't get. if the system sucks so much, if it kills them so much, why are they still sticking around? it's not like anyone puts a gun to their heads telling them to stay, right?

myo came home last friday and offloaded that on me. knowing myo's on a mission to avert all negativity (one of his many new year resolutions) all the complaining is sapping his energy. myo's off the nicotine already and plus the grumblings, he is one antsy man.

oh well... these ppl should really learn to blog or something. purge it somewhere virtual. if the inertia comes from the tacit realization of personal responsibility i think humans should just learn to be more grateful of what they have and focus on the present instead of griping how unfair the world is...

meeeooowww....